Today closed

…yesterday you were strong and playfull tomcat, today you are gone.
One parf of me died with you.
You were my everything. The pain is so strong that I can hardly breathe, I just want you to  feel forever safe, warm and loved. Because I loved you more then anybody or anything else. Because the moment I put you in that cold earth I wanted to grab you out, protect you and run away from everything, even from destinty. Not having you with me cause me so much pain that I can hardly breathe. So I walk and walk, people stare and I am crying, tears running one after another. I am afraid to meet with her despair, she is crying and calling you all around. I am afraid today and afraid tomorrow and the next week.
We didn’t say goodbye, my dearest. I am so sorry.
You died in the middle of the urgent op. All I wanted is to look once more into those eyes, eyes meaning a world to me. I am not sure how and if I can survive this. I am worried that you are now in this cold and dark place, abandonent, and I can not do anything any more for most precious being of my life.
Sleep tight my love.
We will meet under the rainbow. One day. I promise.